Blooming

Don't try to tell me it's not summer
With you and that flower in your hair
The times are changing and I can hope
That without me you might realise I meant something

yeah, alright, I only have a chorus as of yet haha!

my mum is a cunt, and i mean it, not like the whininy kids who hate their mums when they get shouted at for getting all Ds ona grade card.

but I hate her truly

My Birthday :)

Last christmas, I got no presents and so my mum and dad made up for it by buying me a topman coat,

at the end of the day I had 35£ and a coat to show for it. Sure, I might sound selfish but seriously? what the fuck is that about?


So for my birthday I got promised a mac on the day of my birthday I Was soooo happy, 20 inch Imac!

"oohh, you'll have to wait 3 weeks now"

so at the end of yesterday ( my birthday ) I had 100£ and a tamagotchi :)
I love my tamagotchi and I'll be honest that I prefer it to my topman coat :D

Today though, Jen came round and she made me a braclet :D! It's awesome, it's made of wood so I don't think I should wear it in the shower, so I'll refrain from saying "I'll never take it off"..

I hate how I still write songs about you

:)

Thanks nina and Jen<3 :)

nina just loosk cooler with a lower case "n" :)

one day I'll write this book

Prologue

Sixteen, both parents, pretty rich, big house. Happy? Hah...

I killed two people last week, bombshell right? What do you do if you kill someone? First off, did they deserve it? A Dad and his 7 year old kid driving home from his football tournament. I don't think so either. Before you jump to conclusions it wasn't out of cold blood, it wasn't on purpose, I did it to save someone. Not just someone, but her. You know, "that girl". The one that got away?
Yeah, well I'm going to have to tell you what happened now aren't I?

Okay, so it was our after GCSEs prom and I was sat there alone, watching my best friend try to suffocate someone with his tonsils and trying to make up reasons why I can still be happy even though I don't have a date. Then I see her, and Mark Campbell, leaving via the fire escape, I didn't want to watch, but I had to. So I walk across the dance floor, nudge my glass of champagne down Bob's back and listen as he screams and lets his date escape his mouth lock.

Putting my eye to the small slit in the double doors and slowly pushing the right hand door just so I could try to catch a glimpse of them. Further open, further, further. Until the door hit the wall on the other side and they were nowhere to be seen.

So I walked out into the car park to see them stumble onto the road kissing, the odd squeal of laughter escaping they're lips. They were off balance, clearly a bit drunk. I wanted to tell myself he was forcing this on her but I could tell, I could tell she was happy.

Then I see it, a Volvo estate streaking down the road at about 40mph. They had just stepped onto the road, both of them stood there, in each others sickening embrace. I was about 150 meres away and they were about 200 metres from the car, I had no chance. But then I felt something pulse inside me, like the blood inside my body just got thicker, faster. It was adrenaline on a whole new level. I knew I could never save them, but I still ran, I still went hell for leather and ran my heart out, I ran for what felt like 3 seconds and was mere feet from them, I didn't question how but I was going to make it, I shoved them out of the way, onto the floor. I looked right, stared right into the eyes of the 40 year old man driving the Volvo, then to the boy, 7 years old, in full kit. I'll never forget it, it was black with yellow stripes. Then they hit me. Hard. I closed my eyes and led there on the floor, just where I had been stood.

I should have died, but I didn't. I got up, aching, but fine, I was terrified. It was then as I turned around that I saw the site that scared me the most. The Volvo estate, burning, crumpled, dead. It's bonnet was completely crippled, with a V-shaped gap in the centre, supposedly where it had it me. There was no movement inside, I could smell burning fuel, and skin. I looked round to see her, staring back up at me, those blue eyes, filled with tears. They weren't looking at a hero, they were looking at a monster, a monster I couldn't explain. I didn't know the monster, I don't know myself.
So I ran, I ran so fast that after seconds I was home, a journey that should have taken minutes in the car. Everything whizzed past me, colourful blurs were my backdrop.

I was so confused. I still am. All I know is that when I felt that pulse, that surge of power inside me, I was unstoppable.

I should be happy, I should enjoy my powers, but so far they've killed a man, a child and scared the love of my life. So far I'm not a super hero, I'm a villain and with you as my witness I'll change that.




I'll write this one day.

This trophie's on my windowsill (acoustic) - Harry Askew :)

You're my secret lover
I won the race and you
Won't ever steal this Trophie
From my deserving windowsill

Everytime the race begins
The gun is raised, up high
Crack like a whip
I wimper, it's too quick

I'll take this fight to your court
I'll make you kiss the dirt
But thie Trophie's with me

You're my secret lover
I won the race and you
Won't ever steal this Trophie
From my deserving windowsill

You, keep me sane
You're always there
to keep me the same
finish this melody

On a high note


You're my secret lover
I won the race and you
Won't ever steal this Trophie
From my deserving windowsill

You're my secret lover
I won the race and you
Won't ever steal this Trophie
From my deserving windowsill

A word to sum me up

Still

thinking about you:)
missing us:S
having doubts:(
feeling very optomistic:)
in a cracking place:)
worrying:(
smiling:)
frowning:(
all you?

No way,

Don't fucking say that because I know you don't mean it.